dleeted's Xanga

Thrifty Tom Takes Three Tickets to Tango.

Sun, 14 Jun 2009 15:07:34 GMT

Your brain, like your muscles, atrophy without use or exercise and that's kinda where my brain is at now i guess. It's easier to hold my breath til my eyes pop out than to churn out a post.

There are a lot of thoughts in my head but they are not filed in any discernible manner. So as i pluck them out and try to arrange them in a way that's coherent even to me, i usually become frustrated that i have the vocabulary of a Peking duck and am thus unable to manage a decent post.

Either that, or i am quite sore and tired of offending people and have become a Safe Simon. Yes, i tell you what you want to hear - and that's not just limited to your wardrobe options; i will sugar coat any mischief that you've been up to as well. All is well because hey, who am i to judge right?

i've come to believe that it is entirely possible to live a life without any real connection. A community of the not-so-connected. And many, like me, have been pushed and shoved off the escalator to Connectedness because numero uno, we are not as charismatic as Tom Selleck (Plus his macho physique and mustache.), nor are we bad ass like the guys from KISS who really don't give a Pate about what's socially acceptable - Although what's socially acceptable nowadays is like asking, "Can i have fries with that?".

So as some of us feel like the world is changing faster than we can adapt, we shrink and crawl back into our own holes, cut ties to whatever remnant of a real community life we used to have and download enough 90's alt rock into our MP3 players to last a lifetime.

The world is changing and i'm not ready for it. And i've got a feeling that it's not something that i'd want to adapt to. That's not the issue.

Is there romance still? Morals? Boundaries? Holiness? Long suffering? Patience?
As a person, have i got the integrity to live an honest life? As a Christian, have i got the integrity in my worship?
This is not a rebuke, i haven't got the slightest clue. This is me, knowing that there is more to live for than to gratify my own needs. Change is difficult.

Change is necessary. Change is the difference between life and death. Change is what is required.

#1

Sun, 24 May 2009 15:22:10 GMT

Your heart looks for ways to get back
To where the lights shone bright where you stay
And it did not hurt to look away
The curtains were up in every window.

Saturdays brings you back home
To an empty room and the company of six lines
Be still there because you know you'll find
What you seek and where you need to be.

Afraid of casting a line because of lurking thoughts
You swam in the deepest depths of the sea
Hid upstream in the highest tree
You harbour the hope that someday you'll be free.

We've got the solutions to your problems.

Wed, 11 Feb 2009 08:18:13 GMT

But the world is full of people who can give the most elaborate and impassioned advice but do not want to get their hands dirty.

It just might happen again.

Thu, 23 Oct 2008 07:17:54 GMT

Tinged with grey, sugar coated.
With all our excesses and our stomachs bloated.
We don't look like much in these garments of gold and shining silver,
Candy bar wrappers and empty smiles.

Tinged with regret, never fading.
With all our hearts broken and hopes waning.
To make sure that the past is never far,
So we don't forget who we are.

It just might be a darn good thing too.

Friday, October 17, 2008

Fri, 17 Oct 2008 10:34:24 GMT

"It's hard to change the way you lose
if you think you've never won.

All we are, we are
All we are, we are
Everyday's a start of something beautiful."

Our future abode at Sterling@PJ

Sat, 27 Sep 2008 14:06:15 GMT

Our new place.

Inside our unit. Entrance, foyer, dining area and kitchen.

Living area.

The view.

Moving in maybe around January.

Reign over us

Fri, 12 Sep 2008 05:34:27 GMT

So they've finally arrested Raja Petra again under the notorious ISA act.
Things are so muddy and unpredictable in our country right now that it's easy to despair.

My prayer is:

Lord, would You please show Your glory.
Let justice flow, let justice flow into all our hearts.
Let grace tinge all of our actions, all of our words.
Let love prevail; Please, let hope prevail.

Rain arrows into the enemy's camp. Set their homes on fire.
Let them flee from this country. Let their plans be thrown into utter confusion.
They are divided and they stand against You.
Let their house crumble and be destroyed.
Let nothing their evil hearts scheme come into fruition, but let Your perfect plan be unveiled.
This is the time, Lord. i can wait no longer, my heart burns.
Please, let this be the time.

Dad is Well.

Wed, 10 Sep 2008 02:01:13 GMT

Thank God.

On the Tuesday when he went in Universiti Hospital for his scan, the doctor found a growth in his pancreas. After finding out from my sister, i nearly went into a panic. The sinking feeling of helplessness filled me and for a few moments, i was just sat in my office, not really knowing what to do or how to react. After one or two nerve wrecking hours, my sis called to say that the growth was a cyst and it was NOT malignant. *Big giant sigh of relieve.*

Though the entire experience was harrowing, i'm very blessed and happy to see that despite the lack of jargony mumble jumble, dad, mom and sis trusted in Him. And even though the prospect of danger was real, i felt peace that transcended understanding.

Dad was discharged and no medication or surgery was actually required. All he needs is a better and healthier diet that doesn't aggravate his pancreas. It still might turn cancerous but with care and hope, we're happy to just live in the moment.

On Sunday during worship as we sang "What a Friend I've found", i broke down because the revelation of God's otherworldliness struck me. He is so extraordinary but yet, we are called to approach, and called as friends. With the incident still fresh in my mind, i was in awe and filled with gratitude that the God of Heavens knows our every need and keeps His vigil over us.

Jesus, You will never fail.

Updates on dad

Thu, 28 Aug 2008 14:23:10 GMT

Hi friends.

Dad came up to Subang on Tuesday after getting little help from the doctors in Johor. i hope his Air Asia flight wasn't too bumpy.

When i saw him first after work, he was still in pain. At one point he nearly lost his balance trying to navigate the living room. That night itself, we sent him to SJMC for admission and the doctors gave him some medication (Not exactly sure what), and in the morning, he said he felt much better.

As of tonight, the doctors still haven't found out what was wrong with him and according to my dad, the report was inconclusive. But the several things that were:

1. Not stomach ulcers.
2. Related to the pancreas.

So i'm a little worried at the moment. But still, You are in control.
Dad was in good spirits when we visited him with relatives, and i'm thankful for the love that binds us as a unit.

Thank you all for your prayers. Keeping praying if you can. More updates when i get them.

Pray for my dad.

Tue, 26 Aug 2008 14:34:55 GMT

Hi guys. Just got news from my sister that my dad had been admitted to the hospital in Johor.

He had been complaining about a pain in his stomach, and had gone to a doctor for a check-up. i'm not sure what the doctor's diagnosis was but he is now in a hospital to do scoping.

In the meantime, please pray with me that he'll be alright. Pray that it is something not life-threatening. Most of all, pray for God's peace to be with him, my mom and my sister.

Thank you guys.

Will keep you guys posted.